mike

sometimes i look at mike and i can't believe he wants to be with me.

like, he's so calm about everything. nothing seems to bother him. he just... exists in the world without constantly worrying about whether he's doing it wrong.

i asked him how he does that and he said "does what?" and i said "just like, be okay" and he looked confused.

i don't think he gets it. which is good? i guess? i don't want him to feel like this.

we're going to starryeyed77's for dinner tomorrow. (my best friend doesn't want me using her real name on here so i'll just call her by her screen name. privacy and all that.)

she's making pasta. i'm bringing wine and also probably my anxiety about whether i bought the right wine.